How to lose those last 5 pounds without even trying: the Frickin' Scabies diet.

Well, where to begin?  I'll start with the good news:  I'm down to ONE-OH-FIVE!!!!!!  Can you believe that sh!t?!  I cannot.  I would have been happy to hit my 107-108 goal.  But 105?!  That's my post-graduate weight, just without the muscle and with more wrinkles.  So, Mission Accomplished!  Now the trick is to keep it off.  And since I went through an entire BAG of Sprout's delicious "natural" cheese puffs today, I'm not optimistic.  BUT, my P90X system (Bring It!) arrived today.  And you will be hearing more from me and my P90X system (BRING IT!!).

The bad news?  OH, the friggin' bugs.  I lost 5 pounds because I've been in Hell with NO ice water for two weeks now.  I couldn't sleep, couldn't work, and haven't even WANTED to eat (except for that bag of cheese puffs I really wanted those this morning).  As you know, from my last post, I have to get up every morning, strip the bed, wash my sheets, blanket, and pillow, vacuum all over, shower and soak myself with all kinds of potions designed to either kill the microscopic mite bastards or soothe my poor besieged, burned, bumpy, and nearly-destroyed skin, (3X per day) and then clean everything I've touched.  I had to put trash bags over all my chairs, and my car seat, wash everything I use or bag it up immediately, wash the dog and everything the dog sits on daily, and had to buy a play pen for the dog, so that she doesn't sleep in the bed with me and act as a fomite.  (Look how the bugs have improved my vocabulary.)  After two horrible sleepless nights of topical pesticide cream that prevented me from scratching the incredible itch and from putting anything soothing on my body, I determined that the bugs are impervious to the topical pesticide.  In fact, I think they liked it.  Shit.  So I went to the Dr. for the internal bug bomb, known as Ivermectin, because I JUST COULDN'T FRICKIN' TAKE IT ANY MORE!  I was (and still am) an itchy sore, red, sleep-deprived basket case.  That photo doesn't actually do my allergic-to-nasty-microscopic-bugs rash justice -- my skin is actually like twice as bad today, since that photo was taken yesterday.  Hopefully it gets a bit worse as it's getting better.  Anyway, I took that stuff last night, but I don't think that it killed all of the little ba$stards either.  Will find out when I attempt to sleep tonight.  And, even more fun, the intolerably itchy rash is supposed to continue, even after the bugs are gone, for another 4-8 weeks.  Good God.  I've been afflicted with the F'in plague.  No one deserves this.  It is really, really awful.  Anyway, I'ma try not to dwell on how bad it is and give you something positive:  demodex mites, aka eyelash or face mites.  Look 'em up, boys and girls, because, guess what?  YOU probably have them too!!  Oh yes, you do!  You've got both dust mites AND face mites.  So there.  You just don't have the scabies mite, that I like to call Satan's scarab.  The one bright spot in the bug battle, is that the sulfur cream that burned my neck and upper torso actually cleared up the demodex mite population around my eyebrows, eyes, nose, mouth and ears.  I had issues that I didn't even know they were causing, and my skin (on my face anyway) hasn't looked this good since I was 11.  Now if I could only get some sleep.  Gonna have to go get another glass of liquid red sedative.  It's available at most grocers -- just ask for "cabernet sauvignon."

Will blog again when I'm feeling better and have good news and fitness progress to report.